Why Do I Feel Worse After Starting Therapy? Understanding the Healing Curve.

You finally made the call. You filled out the intake forms, showed up to your first session, maybe even two or three. You were ready to feel better. And then—somehow—you didn’t.

Maybe you’ve cried more than usual. Maybe old memories resurfaced out of nowhere. Maybe your sleep is off, your anxiety feels heightened, or you’re suddenly feeling everything all at once.

And now you’re wondering: Did I make a mistake? Is therapy even helping? Why do I feel worse?

If you’ve been feeling this way, please know: you are not alone. In fact, what you’re experiencing might be one of the most honest signs that your healing is actually beginning.

The Myth of the “Upward-Only” Healing Journey

Many of us come into therapy with quiet, hopeful expectations:

• I’ll finally get some relief.

• I’ll leave each session feeling lighter.

• Things will steadily improve.

And sometimes, they do—especially at first. Just telling your story out loud, being truly heard, or naming something you’ve been holding inside can bring powerful relief.

But for many people—especially those working through trauma, grief, chronic stress, attachment wounds, or long-standing patterns—therapy can stir up the very things you’ve been (understandably) trying to avoid. That doesn’t mean therapy is “going wrong.” It often means it’s going deep.

Think of it like this: if you’ve been walking around with a thorn under your skin for years, you’ve learned to walk in a certain way to avoid the pain. You’ve protected it. You’ve adapted around it. And now someone (a therapist) is gently, carefully helping you take it out.

It’s not painless. But it’s the only way to truly heal.

Why You Might Feel Worse Before You Feel Better

Here are some common reasons clients feel temporarily worse after starting therapy—and why that’s often a normal part of the process:

You’re Finally Paying Attention to What You’ve Numbed

Many people come to therapy after years (or decades) of “pushing through.” Dissociation, suppression, over-functioning, people-pleasing, and distraction can be brilliant survival strategies. But once you start slowing down and tuning in, you may notice:

• Emotions you didn’t realize you were carrying.

• Body sensations that had been numbed.

• Thoughts that were always running in the background.

This isn’t regression. It’s awareness. And awareness is always the first step toward change.

You’re Talking About Things You’ve Never Said Out Loud

There’s a reason trauma is called unspeakable. For many clients, simply telling the truth—even in a safe room—can feel destabilizing at first.

That doesn’t mean therapy is harming you. It means your nervous system is adjusting to something new: safety. Being heard. Not having to carry it alone. That kind of vulnerability can feel foreign, even scary. But over time, it becomes grounding.

Your Patterns Are Being Gently Disrupted

Therapy often brings new insight: “Oh, I do tend to shut down during conflict.” Or “I didn’t realize I was always trying to rescue people.” That insight can feel disorienting at first—like the rug is being pulled out from under you.

But in reality, therapy is pulling out the rug you were never meant to stand on. It’s not comfortable. But it is honest. And that’s how new patterns take root.

You’re Finally Safe Enough to Fall Apart (a Little)

This one surprises people the most.

Many clients appear “high-functioning” on the outside—holding jobs, parenting, caretaking, showing up for everyone else. But once they begin therapy, they notice:

• They’re crying more.

• They feel more exhausted.

• Their coping strategies don’t “work” the way they used to.

Here’s the paradox: this often means you finally feel safe enough to let your guard down. Your body may be saying, “We’re not in crisis mode anymore. We can finally rest. We can finally feel.” That release is healing—even when it’s messy.

So… Is This Normal?

In most cases, yes.

It’s common to feel worse temporarily—especially during the first few sessions, or after particularly deep work (like EMDR, parts work, or grief processing). This dip is sometimes called the healing curve or the therapeutic dip. It’s similar to how sore muscles can feel after a good workout: the soreness means you used them in a new way.

That said, there’s a difference between:

• Normal discomfort: emotional waves, temporary overwhelm, processing fatigue, old memories surfacing.

• Too much, too fast: panic, hopelessness, feeling constantly dysregulated or unsafe.

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A skilled therapist (like the team at Root Counseling) will monitor that pacing with you. You are never supposed to suffer endlessly in therapy. The goal is gentle, sustainable healing—not re-traumatization.

How to Support Yourself Between Sessions

If you’ve been feeling this way, here are a few tools you can try:

Name What’s Happening

Instead of “I’m falling apart,” try:

• “Something old is surfacing.”

• “This is my body telling me the story now.”

• “This is part of healing, not proof that I’m broken.”

Journal or Voice-Note Your Process

You don’t have to write a novel. Even jotting down:

• “What came up in session”

• “What I noticed afterward”

• “What helped me feel grounded”…can help you connect dots over time.

Use Your Senses to Ground

Try:

• Running cold water over your hands.

• Noticing five things you can see, four you can touch, three you can hear, two you can smell, one you can taste.

• Wrapping yourself in a blanket and breathing into your belly.

Your nervous system loves predictability and sensation.

Talk to Your Therapist About It

You don’t have to manage it alone. Tell your therapist what you’ve noticed:

• “I felt really raw after last session.”

• “I’m scared I’m doing therapy wrong.”

• “I’m not sure if I’m ready to go that deep yet.”

Good therapy is collaborative. Your therapist can help you slow down, shift gears, or give you tools between sessions.

When to Reach Out for Extra Support

If you’re feeling:

• Suicidal or hopeless

• Constantly panicked

• Like you can’t function in daily life…then it’s important to reach out. This doesn’t mean therapy isn’t for you—it means something in the process needs adjusting. There’s no shame in needing extra support.

If you’re working with Root Counseling, you can always bring this to your therapist directly. If you’re not yet working with someone, this may be the perfect time to start with a trauma-informed, nervous-system-aware therapist who can walk with you through this terrain.

Final Thought: Feeling Is a Sign of Healing

It’s deeply human to want therapy to feel like instant relief. And sometimes, it does.

But more often than not, healing is less like a straight line—and more like a spiral. We return to old wounds, but with new tools. We revisit old memories, but from a safer place. We feel more, but we also understand more.

If you’re feeling worse right now, it doesn’t mean you’re failing at therapy. It might just mean you’re finally telling the truth—and your body, heart, and mind are catching up.

You are not broken. You are becoming.

And you don’t have to do it alone.

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At Root Counseling, our therapistsare dedicated to helping clients heal, grow, and find safe connection. To schedule a session with one of our therapists, you can visit us here.